Are You Enlightened?

Don't get me wrong. I can put my hand up to fair few of the below- and anyone who has ever seen my road rage will know; no enlightenment here. There's nothing wrong with any of these things per se- but I get the sense that some people think that they are somehow evolving the planet because they do certain things they heard about when travelling in Goa on their gap year.  So the below is my no-means-comprehensive list of how to not tell if you're on 'a path'. 

- You are not enlightened just because you eat vegan cake

- You are not enlightened just because you know the name of the person who founded your particular style of yoga

- You are not enlightened just because you wear hemp, smoke hemp or sprinkle hemp seeds on your breakfast cereal.

- You are not enlightened just because you don't wash. You are just unpopular.

- You are not enlightened just because you own a tarot deck. Even if your tarot deck is an obscure one with cards named after ancient Egyptian sand worms.

-You are not enlightened just because you roll your cigarettes with papers you got from a 'special shop' in Brighton.

- Or play the hang drum

- Or the sitar

- Or use the word 'journey' a lot.

- And the number one reason that you can't possibly be enlightened: Because you say you are.